Female Bashing Jokes – Jokes About Women

Sorry Girls, but these are Funny!

Female Jokes – Female Snowman

Q: Why does it take longer to make a female snowman?
A: Takes longer to hollow out the head!!

Female Jokes – Sex Drive

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman’s sex drive by 90%… Wedding cake.

Female Jokes – Black Eyes

Q: What do you call a women with two black eyes?
A: Slow learner!!

Female Jokes – Good Excuse

A man bought a new Mercedes to celebrate his wife leaving him and was out on the highway for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80 mph, he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him.

“There’s no way they can catch a Mercedes,” he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100…..Then the reality of the situation hit him. “What am I doing?” he thought and pulled over. The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car.

“It’s been a long hard day, this is the end of my shift and it’s Friday the 13th. I don’t feel like more paperwork, I don’t need the frustration, so if you can give me a really good excuse for your driving that I haven’t heard before, you can go.”

The guy thinks about it for a second and says, “Last week my nagging wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid you were trying to give her back!”

“Have a nice weekend,” said the officer.

Female Jokes – Dish Washer

Q: Why is a wedding dress white?
A: So the dishwasher will match the oven and the fridge.

Female Jokes – Snow Blower

Q: How do you turn a dish washer into a snow blower?
A: Give the girl a shovel.

Female Jokes – Marriage

After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” The husband replied, “Yes, dear, but I was so in love and didn’t notice.”

Female Jokes – Watches

Q. Why don’t women wear watches?
A. There’s a clock on the stove!

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